Re: General Chat 2014

by Heart of Lyoko Thu Feb 06, 2014 4:05 pm

I know, but I still want my weight to drop. Constantly stuck between not eating and going on a binge.

by No.1JerlitaFan Thu Feb 06, 2014 6:02 pm

You could move it to the Arcade under the name, "Continue the Story?"

Heart, I'm sorry but I'm honestly no good at giving advice, nor am I good at comforting unless I'm there in person....so I'm not much help right now :/

by Heart of Lyoko Thu Feb 06, 2014 10:04 pm

It's okay, no need to apologize, I just needed to get it out. I don't dare to tell this to anyone who knows me because they would probably kill me as I'm considered on the skinny side of the scale. I'm constantly stuck between not eating and going on a binge while limiting how much I eat during mealtimes.
I can't express how disgusted I felt after I finished my breakfast. It would be a waste to not finish it up though.

Also, school is stressing me out so badly. Why must there be tests or quizzes almost every day? I don't see the point. All it does is stress students out.
I just finished a quiz on the double angle formulae. It was an eight mark paper to be done is 12 minutes. I blanked out halfway and nearly burst into tears from all the stress and pressure.

I don't know if I'll even get to the end of this year.

by Stella Luce 333 Fri Feb 07, 2014 8:01 am

I’m not a medical professional, but do you think that your stress is affecting your eating/weight?

I agree that it feels like an Arcade game instead of an RP (but I don’t really RP too much)…I just don’t want to post my next part in the wrong place…

by Heart of Lyoko Fri Feb 07, 2014 8:22 am

Sounds probable..

My entire CCA met with the Principal today. From this year onwards for my school, we won't be recruiting new cadets any more. Talk about slipping back into depressing times. Exhausted after crying for over an hour.

by eseiprahs Fri Feb 07, 2014 10:51 am

Heart, I can try my best to help you with your hard times with this anxiety or whatever it is you're struggling with. I'm a bit weight-conscious despite the fact that I can eat like an elephant. My friends want to kill me sometimes because I will complain about not being able to see my hip bones as clearly as I used to, or if I think my thigh gap is disappearing. I'm trying to get out of that habit though. Point is, I can relate to you at least a little probably. I can try and help!

If you're feeling overboard with stress though, I would take a literal chill pill. I have Lorazepam pills and they work like magic to calm me down if I feel an episode coming on. I would look into getting a prescription for some if you're having heavy anxiety.

by Heart of Lyoko Sat Feb 08, 2014 12:06 am

Thank you, Essy.

I doubt that my mum would allow me to get a prescription though. She thinks I'm perfectly fine, and the only thing wrong about me is that I have poor time management and I don't know how to relieve stress well enough. Yeah, right. I've also tried to talk to her once about the probability of me having depression, but she pretty much waved me away. Honestly speaking, I'd rather go to a professional to get a diagnosis and medication, than not knowing whether there is anything out of the ordinary.

Oh, have I mentioned that one of my closer friends is ruining our friendship just because I wouldn't wear a choker?

by eseiprahs Sun Feb 09, 2014 1:44 am

That's too bad you probably could'nt get a prescription...have you talked to her about how you're feeling at all though?

That's dumb someone would ruin a friendship over that...doesn't sound real to me...

by Heart of Lyoko Sun Feb 09, 2014 8:35 am

Not really, because I feel that she doesn't exactly listen or understand. She always says that the reason I feel depressed or lonely because I don't make enough friends. Then, I have to listen to one of her speeches on having to make more friends/ having better stress or time management and so on.

I'm dreading school so much that I'm planning to pretend to feel unwell in the morning, and when I'm in school, purge my breakfast so that I can hopefully be sent home.

by eseiprahs Sun Feb 09, 2014 3:50 pm

Do you have social anxiety?

In my opinion, more friends would probably would help your depression. It's nice having a lot of friends, because the more people you can spend time with, the more you can forget about the depression. I'm saying this from personal experience.

by Heart of Lyoko Sun Feb 09, 2014 4:49 pm

Hmm I'm not too sure about that. I'm fine being in an environment with a few strangers, and have made friends from those tiny events. Put me in a crowd, however, and I'll flip.

Maybe that's the case for you? I'm not too sure about making friends. It's my last year here, and it's either I know them or I don't. I'm not great at the whole friends thing.

by eseiprahs Mon Feb 10, 2014 1:16 am

Are you still in high school or are you in college?

by Heart of Lyoko Mon Feb 10, 2014 6:20 am

I'm 16, so I guess I'd be in high school? I'm not too sure because Singapore has a different system from you guys.

I made myself puke in the morning in school so that I would get sent home. And to avoid having to go to school tomorrow, I made myself vomit twice more. After dinner, once more. Let the extra calories out, as well as avoid school.

by eseiprahs Mon Feb 10, 2014 12:38 pm

Yes, that would be high school.

Okay, from what you're saying right now, like, you have a serious problem. You need to tell your mom or dad (whoever you're closest with) what's up. What you're saying you're doing is not normal.

by cya6 Mon Feb 10, 2014 12:48 pm

Heart, I agree with Essy. I KNOW you don't think they'll be any help and that it'll make things worse, but at your point, I'm really afraid things can't get much worse.
Please please talk to them.

by **Snickie** Mon Feb 10, 2014 9:05 pm

Vomit consists largely of stomach acid. Every time you purge like that, it eats away at your esophagus and your mouth (teeth especially). Over time, you really will start to have a physical problem.

You HAVE to eat. Calories aren't the problem. Nutrition is. Your body needs nutrients to keep itself going. When you purge, you not only "get rid of calories" but you also rob your body of these essential nutrients. They can help raise your metabolism so that you can naturally burn more calories.

If you're determined to diet, at least start with a proper detox. Juice or smoothie cleansing, etc etc. Fruits and vegetables are (mostly) low in calories and high in nutrients, as long as you don't add anything to them.

...
I don't really know how to suggest managing the mental stress though. :\

by Heart of Lyoko Tue Feb 11, 2014 5:43 am

I don't know... I don't trust anyone around me as of now.

I don't want to go back to school. I hate school. I hate all the stress and pressure I'm getting. I hate the people in school. I hate the fact that it's so competitive. I hate that there is practically a test a day. I hate most of the lessons. I hate being weak. I hate everything.

by Stella Luce 333 Tue Feb 11, 2014 8:02 am

If your parents aren’t taking you seriously, can you see a doctor on your own? If not, maybe you can send your doctor an e-mal, & find out his/her thoughts?

by Heart of Lyoko Tue Feb 11, 2014 4:30 pm

I made an appointment with a counsellor online for tomorrow. There aren't many counsellors out here unless you go to the Institute of Mental Health. If I go there, my parents will find out, because I'm pretty sure they'll contact my parents.

I'm on the way to school now, and I already feel like screaming my head off and running away. Sigh.

by Stella Luce 333 Wed Feb 12, 2014 7:40 am

Do you think your parents might take these issues more seriously if they knew you sought out counseling?

by Heart of Lyoko Wed Feb 12, 2014 3:20 pm

I'm not sure about that. Even though they would, I still wouldn't tell them. I highly doubt they would be able to understand me fully, even if they tried. Also, I don't have an official diagnosis, so technically, as of now, they can say that there's nothing wrong with me in the slightest.

Another day at school, and I've yet to touch any of my homework.

by eseiprahs Wed Feb 12, 2014 11:25 pm

I hope you figure this all out, Heart!

I feel ya on the procrastinating thing.

by Heart of Lyoko Thu Feb 13, 2014 4:04 am

Thank you, Essy Smile

Yeah, it gets so bad that I usually leave the work till when it's due, then I rush everything out. Probably the worst way of coping with deadline stress

by eseiprahs Thu Feb 13, 2014 9:05 pm

I'm procrastinating because my friend is here, haha

by Heart of Lyoko Mon Feb 17, 2014 4:05 pm

I'm procrastinating because I cannot be bothered. I'm tired of having my life controlled by work. I'm going to spend at least the first 21 years of my life studying and studying. After that, it's off to the workforce. Where have the times of fun and joy in learning gone to? I don't think any student should be feeling so worked up and distressed over school. I mean, we're still teenagers, still growing and learning. What's the point of stressing us out so much?
I've grown to fear and detest school, like literally a phobia of school. The thought of going to school is enough to bring me close to tears, and I can see a slide in my attitude. I've never thought of skipping school or running away from home to avoid school before, but now that I think about it, it is quite appealing...

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