Totally Mystery and the Thief of Life

[SMARTAgentKC]

Hey Guys SMARTAgentKC here with one of his best stories yet. 

I went though several months of Roleplaying a crossover RP of Totally Spies and Martin Mystery (which is a canon based crossover as the two have had an adventure together before) with a few friends of mine and the story ideas we came up with were so amazing that I just had to take all that data and put it into a fanfic series and have the main canon characters go through adventures based on the stuff we wrote.

Now granted a lot of the stuff I filtered through and some edits were made to various characters with their creator's permission and I had to create some back story to introduce the various other created characters.

I will post this story Chapter by Chapter in a Google Doc and post the links here in this topic.

I would like it if someone would read this over and help me detect Grammar issues. I also have a finished product on Fanfiction.net with the same title that you guys could read and I am currently working on the second fic as we speak

Chapter 1
https://docs.google.com/document/d/119l1idYld0lfuS_kbAAsxnON3zmCnfFkNJIyP15U70g/edit?usp=sharing

[Stella Luce 333]

This is really good! It’s been a long time since I’ve seen Totally Spies, but the voices of the characters sound spot on…
 
Since you specifically asked for grammar help: Your biggest issue is run on sentences. Luckily, this has an easy fix. Simply say your sentences out loud, & insert punctuation wherever you stop to take a breath (most likely a period after a complete thought or a comma after a phrase).
 
That said, normally run on sentences are my biggest pet peeve…but not only did I finish the first story, I’m currently reading the second!